The Lincoln Logue | Trump’s Army Parade Was Brought to You by Crypto Bros, ICE Defies NYC Law, & Social Security Quietly Implodes
The military-industrial-influencer complex is alive and well — and sponsored by Dana White.
This week, the Trump administration pushed further into dystopia, mixing corporate sponsorships with military patriotism, gutting Social Security by stealth, and sending ICE to stalk immigrants outside courtrooms in defiance of local law. All while Republicans abandoned their “fiscal hawk” cosplay to usher in a record-setting debt hike — one they hope you’re too busy doomscrolling to notice.
Meanwhile, the Middle East is at war. Again. But this time, the escalation between Israel and Iran is drawing in global powers at breakneck speed. Trump’s second term is starting to feel less like a presidency and more like a live-action rerun of history’s worst decisions.
Welcome to The Lincoln Logue, your satirical digest of Trump’s America — brought to you this week by Phorm Energy Drink™. (Just kidding. Sort of.)
Monday, June 16th — Trump’s Military Parade, Sponsored by his Friends
▌SUPPORT OUR TROOPS … brought to you by Coinbase?
Saturday’s $45 million military parade celebrating the U.S. Army’s 250th anniversary didn’t just honor the troops — it advertised to them. UFC figurehead Dana White, Oracle, Palantir, and Coinbase all helped fund the event, with branding, logos, and product placements embedded into what should have been a solemn national commemoration. Energy drinks flowed freely, logos were beamed across giant screens, and “support” for the military doubled as a marketing pitch. Notably, all the sponsoring entities maintain cozy ties to Donald Trump — personal, political, or financial.
Ethics experts from both parties were appalled. Former Bush ethics chief Richard Painter and Obama adviser Norm Eisen warned that the event blurred — if not outright erased — lines between public office and private enrichment. It’s not just a bad look; it’s potentially illegal under federal regulations that ban using government platforms to promote non-governmental interests. But instead of acknowledging the criticism, the White House doubled down, framing the New York Times’ coverage as an insult to the military.
The message was unmistakable: The Trump administration sees no boundary between governance and grift. Public rituals are for sale, patriotic spectacle is just another sponsorship opportunity, and loyalty to the president buys you airtime on the National Mall. America250, the commission behind the parade, has yet to explain who paid what — but the cost to democracy is already evident.
Source: NYT